Parenting: Teach your children these important words

Things you need to teach your Child(ren) at early age:

1: Warn your Girl Child Never to sit on anyone's laps no matter the situation including uncles.

2: Avoid Getting Dressed in front of your child once he/she is 2 years old. Learn to excuse them or yourself.

3. Never allow any adult refer to your child as 'my wife' or 'my husband'

4. Whenever your child goes out to play with friends make sure you look for a way to find out what kind of play they do, because young people now sexually abuse themselves.

5. Never force your child to visit any adult he or she is not comfortable with and also be observant if your child becomes too fond of a particular adult.

6. Once a very lively child suddenly becomes withdrawn you may need to patiently ask lots of questions from your child.

7. Carefully educate your grown ups about the right values of sex . If you don't, the society will teach them the wrong values.

8: It is always advisable you go through any new Material like.

NO GUARANTEE OF TOMORROW: THE DEATH OF HER HUSBAND SAVED MY MARRIAGE

THIS WRITE UP WILL BE USEFUL TO MARRIED AND UNMARRIED COUPLES.

Susan attended a funeral service of her friend who lost her husband at Langata Cemetery.

Susan held her wailing friend strongly as the casket was lowered into the freshly dug grave.

Susan's friend was screaming "My husband don't leave me, please, don't leave me!" as people looked on feeling sad for her. 

The children were screaming too. Losing a father is not an easy thing.

If not for Susan, the friend would have thrown herself into the grave to be buried with her husband who died of suicide.  Because, the husband found no meaning in life and he killed himself.

Susan remembered the many times the friend would say she is tired of her good for nothing husband and here she is screaming and feeling lost because the husband is no more. 

The friend cried till she fainted. Susan and the rest people around carry the devasted woman to an ambulance for first aid.

As Susan watched the spectacle of broken hearts crying for a man who will never ever come back, Susan remembered her husband. 

Susan remembered how much she takes her husband for granted.

How she talks to him however she pleases.

How she gives him prolonged silent treatment over issues they can easily resolve.

How she denied him sex many times. And she asked herself "What if it  my husband that is buried today how would I feel?" Susan thought.

Susan remembered that she argued with her husband and he left the house with tension between them just because after all these years, he still leaves his plate in the living room instead of taking it to the sink after eating.

"God forbid that my husband die, but what if as my husband went out in anger and never returns and passes on, is this the last memory I would like my husband and I to have?" She thought again.

Susan began to remember all the wonderful things her husband has done in the past, which she never taught of before except complaining.

Now, in her heart, she begin to appreciates him for all his efforts no matter how small it was.

At that moment, she realise her areas of improvement, and said to herself "there is no other man I would rather share her life with than my loving husband."

She thought of life without him and it scared her. And said, "I would rather have disagreements with my loving husband than to lose him to death. I prefer his sense of humour and laughter than to cry for losing him."

That evening, after Susan took her widowed friend to a safe place, she passed by at the supermarket and bought her husband a card saying "Thank you for being in my life"

And when she got home, she cooked her husband's favourite meal and asked her children to join her in celebrating her husband.

That night, her husband came home expecting a fight from Susan, but instead, he got greeting and hugs from Susan and the children. 

He was welcomed with songs, dancing and laughter, cute drawings of him with warm messages from the children, a home cooked meal, pleasant conversations. And Susan's husband bust into tears when Susan and the children told him how much they love him and then surrounded him to pray for him. 

A grown man cried like a baby because of love. He felt needed and he asked them "Is today father's day?"

Susan looked into his eyes and said, "No, it is lover day. Because, everyday is special with you around me from now on, we will do nothing but love each other. 

I don't know how long we have to live together, but it will not be wasted by fights, misunderstanding, complains and lack of appreciation. 

In case you have forgotten, "I love you"

"I love you too" said Susan's husband as he kissed and hugged Susan, the children dancing and cheering on. 

Children long for a home where mom and dad give each other warmth.

Since then, both Susan and her husband have been a stronger and more loving couple after realizing that tomorrow is not guaranteed.

  

                

~ Sometimes the death of someone wakes us up to the reality of life.

~ Don't let the death of your spouse wake you up to the reality of life, it will be too late.

~ God forbid, if your spouse die today, will you regret how you have been treating him/her?

~ Do you think living alone without your spouse will be joyful to you?

~ Will you be able to transfer your children to another man or woman whom they have not grown to know?

~ If you decide to be a single father or mother, will you be able to do the job alone? 

~ Can you stand the pain of your kids asking why they don't have a father or mother like others?

~ What is it that you cannot mend in your marriage?

~ No doubt its not easy, but prayerfully love your spouse while he/she lives. It rubs on the children as well.

So mend your home, don't destroy it.

This post can save a family, therefore kindly share with others.

PLEASE HUSBAND MAKE SURE YOUR WIFE READ THIS ONE

Source: Social media

SAVE THE GIRL CHILD: CARELESS MOTHERS/PARENTS

IF YOU KNOW YOU CANT TRAIN AND WATCH A FEMALE CHILD GROW UNDER YOUR ROOF TILL 2O YEARS AND ABOVE, WHY THEN DO YOU GIVE BIRTH TO THEM?*

A week ago a 13 year old girl was found pregnant but she didn't know who impregnated her. But I will tell you the truth, she was raped by someone nearby and threatened not to report.

When Doctors conducted tests on her they found she was not a virgin meaning someone had been sexually abusing her.

Just yesterday another story of 13 year old who was staying with her uncle was found raped and killed.

Listen, If a man can remove the diaper of a 6 days old baby clamp the little baby's feet and rape her what would stop such a man from raping a 13 year old little girl??

The quicker we realize that we are living in a rotten society the better for our girls.

*Even at school and sometimes mosques and churches, the girls are raped by male teachers, students, religious leaders as well.*

*Even at home the girls are raped by brothers, uncles, fathers, grandfathers, nephews and male workers.*

Worse of it is even at the police station where the girls are raped right there by male police officers.

My job is to alert you and tell you things as I see them and witness on the ground.

*The truth is the girl child is not safe anywhere so what should we do as parents to help our little girls.*

***-Teach our girls to dress decently. Naked dresses should be avoided by mothers, sisters aunties, maids, mentors and our daughters. 

***Teach our girls to fear the night because that's when most predators lurk around and wait for the victims.

***Teach our girls what is inappropriate behavior so that they know when someone is touching them wrongly.

***Seriously teach our girls some defence mechanisms that have helped several girls.

***Sex education is very important for our girls. *Let a girl child or even boy child know that PRIVATE PARTS are not to be touched or played with, let them understand that nobody is to see their private parts unless their husbands or wives.*

***Teach your little girls not to be trusting around men of any nature.

*When I was growing up I wondered why my mother would make my sister wear underwear or wrap herself in a scarf when my uncles and father were at home, it is now that I realize that our mothers have always known from generations that even family members rape, defile and sexually abuse the girl child.*

We girls in my family dress properly at home without exposure thinking that our male family members are just family.

 *Help protect others from temptations.*

***Don't be careless and trusting for as we speak some mothers are still stitching the wounds of their little girls.

***Don't be that woman who hides such disgusting acts under a carpet to save your marriage or family; think about that broken girl child.

***As a man, don't be that man who undresses in front of a 10 year old girl and without shame commit the act.

***Don't be that neighbor who knows that abuses are happening in a particular house and you close your ears to the cries of a girl child.

***Don't be that Police Officer who takes bribe and allows the perpetrators of child sexual abuse to walk away free.

*It looks simple until your own little girl is affected.*

 *Be vigilant and don't make your child one of the Year 2020 & beyond statistics.*

***Let parents practice the fear of the Lord and how they must not do anything to offend so that the girl child can know how the love and fear of God is practiced!

*No one, I repeat no one can protect the girl child more than you the mother, the auntie, the cousin, the sister,* 

*PLEASE, WAKE UP!!!*

*PROTECT THE GIRL CHILD!!!.*

*IF THIS ARTICLE MAKES SENSE TO YOU, AND YOU ARE REALLY FEELING BAD THE WAY FEMALE CHILDREN ARE BEING MOLESTED, THEN...*

*YOU ARE PERMITTED TO SHARE AND POST TO ANY LENGTH YOU CAN, TO BOTH MOTHERS AND FATHERS ON YOUR LIST AND TO ANY GROUP AND PAGE.*

SAVE THE  GIRL CHILD TODAY!*.

THANKS

OUR GRANDPAS HAD 'SIDE CHICKS' aka "ALE" AND WILL REMAIN WITH HUMANITY

In those days, mothers and grannies knew their hubbies' "ales" (concubines). Call them side chicks today.  In fact, they knew the day the "ale" would be coming to farm to collect food stuffs. They would respect themselves and won't go to farm that day.

"I am going out o", baba would announce. 

"Are you still coming back?" Mama would ask.

"No. You may lock your door."

Case closed. Mama knew where her hubby would spend the night. Before he came back following morning, his food was ready.  And it won't be poisoned!

At times, you would bring home a lady or guy from your hometown and your mum would say never, you can't marry him or her and she would never tell you why. She would do everything to separate you guys. 

She had her reasons. That lady or guy was sired by your father.  Mother knew but won't tell you until much, much later!

Your uncle (daddy's elder brother) would die and daddy would simply "take over" his wife and mama would politely oblige! 

I can hear many of you, especially, women saying: "THIS IS RUBBISH!" "ABSOLUTE NONSENSE!" "ORO RIRUN!" "I CAN NEVER TAKE THESE!" "GOD FORBID BAD THING!" "WE WILL ALL DIE THERE!"

NINE out of TEN of those our mothers knew what to do to make life miserable for both hubby and "ale". They could have easily killed them. They could have walked away and abandon their kids. 

But they knew the implication of broken homes. It was the indignities they suffered and endured that made their children what they later became in life.

If they didn't suffer these "nonsenses", their kids would not even go to school. 

While we are living in a DIFFERENT society from theirs, it was not by accident that many of them lived to be 80, 85, 95, 100. 

Yet, those of us who now have access to the best life can ever hardly live to be 65! 

Granny lived to be 98.  But her granddaughter died at 50!  

Reasons: 

▪️Grandma held a tradition of keeping her peace with her husband, his kith and kin by all means

▪️ Grandma dedicated herself  raising her children under their fathers roof and paternal influence.

▪️Grandma believed that, for her children to do well in life, they needed the father's blessing.

▪️She had been a woman raised by her own mother with the consciousness that after your God, is your Lord (husband). And that a proper woman lives in her husband's house, and never creates any reason to leave, till death do them part.

▪️She never knew single motherhood as an option or a respectable way of life life, because women who could not manage their homes were actually known to have failed in their God-given mandate in the lives of husbands and children.

▪️ Grandma believed that men are men, and knew that her submissiveness to the lion of her tribe was a major way to keep him tender towards her, irrespective of his other rascalities.

▪️ Grandma was a totally faithful woman to her husband, and very loyal without considering that as a favor to her husband. She knew that her chastity in marriage was key to her husband's prosperity. This is spiritual.

▪️ Grandma knew that each time her husband brought out the cane to discipline erring children, her duty was to support him discipline them, and could only pet and soothe the crying child secretly later. She taught children a lesson with this system; _The Father's authority is unquestionable._ This was a tradition which helped traditional rulership so effective and efficient in those days. Mothers taught children to obey rules strictly.

▪️ Grandma made her husband realize that she had no other idol than him. He therefore was always under the burden of conscience and responsibility to feed and clothe her and her children at the least, even if school wasn't in the picture.

▪️ Grandma would live in her husband's hut with her family, and with contentment. She would never drive him to go look for a bigger house and buy a bicycle or motorcycle to impress her friends. Infact she never had any gang of friends. Only a few gossip and jist partners. They kept life simple and we're happy

▪️ Grandma knew how to "gbojukuro". That is, she knew how "to look away" from people's faults, especially from her husband and children.

▪️By virtue of all these she was able to hold her Peace....and have true peace within her soul at all times. Life was simple for her because she made it simple for herself and her family.

Today, these values we saw in Grandma seem lost. And her own granddaughter lived to about half her age

Cause of death: High Blood Pressure! 

Mama's cause of death: Old Age!!

Can we have the spirit of Grandma in our wives and daughters again?

Psychology: 8 reasons why parents are responsible for their children's waywardness

1.) Parent who give their children everything they ask for: _Their children will grow up thinking they have a right to whatever they want._ 

 2.) Parents who laugh when their children speak foul language against others, especially older persons: _Children grow up thinking disrespect is normal and fun_ .

 3.) Parents who do not reprimand children for bad behavior: _Their children grow up thinking that there are no rules in_ _society_ .

 4.) Parents who cover up their children's misdeeds: _Their children grow up thinking they can do and undo with impunity; that they won't have to give account of their misdeeds._ 

 5.) Parents who stop watching television because their children cry when they change channels: _Children will grow up without a sense of respect for older persons_ .

 6.) Parents who let their children listen to music that objectivizes women, encourages sex and violence? _You can't sow thorns and reap cotton, can_ _you_ ?

 7.) Parents who give their children money whenever they want: _Such kids will grow up thinking money is easy and would steal when they can't get it_ _correctly_ .

 8.) Parents who always decide everything in favour of their children, whether they are right or not: _Their children will grow up thinking that every correction is_ _persecution_ .

 THUS SAYS THE HOLY BOOK: _Teach the child the path to follow, and even when he is older he will not deviate from it_ .

📢 Please post this in groups. There are many parents in various groups who do not know these things🔈🔈

 *Albert Einstein said* *this* :

"The world is dangerous to live in, not because of those who hurt, but because of those who watch and let it happen."

 *Then, Desmond TUTU also said this* :

"If you are neutral in a situation of injustice, it is because you have chosen the camp of the oppressor"

 *And Martin Luther King said this* :

"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. What frightens me is not the oppression of the wicked, but the indifference of the good. .... then , in the end, we will remember, not the evils of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.".

COMMON MISTAKES OF THE MODERN DAY FATHERS

By Bisi Adewale 

During the Mothers’ Day celebration in a prison, a Christian ministry visited the inmates with greeting cards they could send to their mothers. The ministry offered to pay for the postage of the cards to their mothers.

All inmates came out of their cells to send the greeting cards to their mothers to the extent that more had to be provided because there weren’t enough for the inmates.

 

They all wrote emotional messages to their mothers, appreciating them for their love, care, attention and support.

 

These are some of the words they penned for their mothers:

“Sweet Mother, you are the best”

“Mum I disappointed you, I am sorry”

“I love you mum”

“Super Mum”

“Mum, this is your Mum of the Century award”

“I don’t deserve you mum, you are too much”

“You sold all to pay for my lawyer’s fees. I don’t know how to thank you”

“All abandoned me, but you are just there. You are more than a million”

Encouraged with the responses of the inmates, the prison ministry purchased a large number of cards for Father’s Day celebration with the thought that inmates would need to send lovely wishes to their fathers.

 

They were wrong. Unfortunately, only ten inmates out of thousands came out to pick cards. Three of them wrote negative things on their cards. Curious, the ministry involved decided to interview some of the inmates about their relationship with their fathers. What they said should be food for thought for all fathers. Some of them said:

“My father is the reason I am here. He is a bad example.”

“He was never in my life. I don’t know him.”

“I don’t have a father. He is late, but he is living in Ohio now.”

“He made me wild.”

“I hate him.”

“He beats my mum regularly.”

“He is an idiot.”

“I don’t like him.”

“He made me gay.”

“I met him for the first time when I was 12.”

“He said he was not my father.”

“He divorced my mother when I was 3. I met him twice after.”

“He is a pastor of a church, but a devil at home.”

‘’We are three boys, raised by an idiotic and alcoholic father and we are all in prison.’’

“Please don’t mention his name.”

“He introduced me to porn. I became a sex addict and rapist, here I am.”

“That idiot slept with my sister”

The following summarizes what mothers are doing and the mistakes some fathers are making. Every father who is reading this should take heed and avoid the common mistakes of modern fathers.

ABSENTEE FATHERHOOD

Lots of fathers are absent from the lives of their children. Millions of children are being raised by single mothers worldwide. It’s a mistake on the part of any man to abandon his children for their mother only.

MIDNIGHT FATHERHOOD

Some fathers are home mostly at night while their children are fast asleep.

DELEGATING PARENTING

Some fathers delegate almost everything about parenting to their wives. They believe their only duty at home is to pay house rent, school fees and other bills. This is very wrong. School fees cannot raise a child. An excellent father is much involved in rearing, nurturing, caring, training and parenting his children. He is ready to attend parents-teachers meetings and he is available on important days in the lives of his children.

 

ORDER, JUDGEMENT SYSTEM

Some fathers run the order-judgement system. They give order to their children in the morning and come out to judge them in the night for any wrongdoing. No love, no interaction, no intimacy and no effective communication.

EXECUTIVE FATHERHOOD

Lots of fathers are executive in nature. They behave like managers at home. Their rooms are their offices. They issue orders which everybody must obey. They have a formal relationship with their wives and children.

CELEBRITY FATHERHOOD

Some fathers who are famous or in a position of leadership and authority are fond of having a celebrity mindset at home. They behave like a tin-god and separate themselves from their children. Some pastors are fond of this too. They fail to know the difference between spiritual and biological fatherhood. They are so far from their children and still busy even when at home. They find it difficult to have a personal relationship with their children.

IRRESPONSIBLE FATHERHOOD

Can you imagine this home? The father gets a fat salary but he hardly drops a dime at home for his wife and children. This is an act of irresponsible fatherhood.

CHILD ABUSE

Some fathers, especially in Africa, believe that the best way to raise a child is to beat them and inflict injury. They use everything to harm their children in the name of discipline. Some even use blades to harm their children.

A father made his 16-year-old daughter stand clad on the street to shame her for committing fornication. This is simply Child abuse, not discipline. The Bible supports child discipline, not child abuse. See this:

“Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the ROD OF CORRECTION shall drive it far from him.” Proverbs 22:15 KJV.

Note that it is the rod of correction the Bible calls it, not the rod of affliction. Child abuse is wrong, don’t do it.

NON INVOLVEMENT

Some fathers are at home but they are never involved in the lives of their children. They pay the bills and provide all things, but they will never raise a finger. They believe that their wives only are responsible for raising children. This is wrong. A father must be involved in all the 6 phases of parenting namely:

Childbearing

Child rearing

Child nurturing

Child discipline

Childcare

Child training

This is what excellent parenting is all about.

WIFE BATTERING

Modern men are still committing the crime of beating their wives, the mothers of their children with impunity. This is a grave mistake that a father must not commit.

CHILD BRIBERY

Trying to bribe a child to behave in a certain way by promising a reward only teaches a child that they get a prize if they act inappropriately first, and then change their behaviour. If you want them to act appropriately for the first time, a good child discipline alternative is to remind them how good it feels to make the right choices or to simply give the predetermined positive consequence for positive behaviour.

Culled from the book Excellent Fatherhood

Let me add this.

* Always find time to discuss with your children in a friendly manner.

God bless all fathers. Cheers